June 5th, 2006



If any of you Californicators need some help with judicial elections, the LA County Bar Association will at least tell you how qualified the candidates are. If you're feeling easily led, you can always go with the LA Times recommendations.

The Pentagon is in the midst of rewriting various sections of Army field manuals. The old version useta say that the US military would "comply with the principles, spirit and intent" of the Geneva Convention. The new version (still under debate) will just sorta skip over parts of the Geneva Convention that are apparently too restrictive of the American military's overwhelming need to offer "humiliating and degrading treatment" to its detainees. '"The overall thinking," said a participant familiar with the defense debate, "is that they need the flexibility to apply cruel techniques if military necessity requires it."'
I know *I* find this new development humiliating and degrading. George the Cruel has a nice ring to it. Not so sure about George the Cruel-but-only-by-military-necessity.
glycerol and oleic acid

Not Politics

P -> Q
Therefore ~P

I was witness to lots of BBQage this weekend, including two separate tritips on Saturday. Sunday's BBQ experiment included the chayote, which was not a big hit with Rebecca, though I found it no more bland than any other squashoid thing.

Saturday also saw a little more Lurker action, with Andrew and A&K. Knowing of Aaron's new fixation on Guitar Hero, I brought it along and introduced Andrew to the game. Andrew actually has Godzilla as a ringtone and his eyes lit up as he saw it in the playlist. I do declare, GH is the new DDR... or at least I am hearing the same phrase applied to it: "I'm going to buy a PlayStation just so I can play this game."
Anyway, good food, good company, good fun... good weekend.

(no subject)

Newsflash: Mike sides with church in controversial court case.

Ten second summary:
A marital affair comes to the attention of church leaders.
Church leaders start gossipping about it.
Mr. Flagrante Delicto and Ms. Scarlet Woman are pissed off and suing.

Making the situation public is not nice (though apparently expected in this church). Hinting at making the affair a public topic in a sermon is nasty. Threatening to tell Scarlet Woman's employer is a low-down, dirty trick.
But where o where is the church doing something illegal?
I usually side with Americans United for Separation of Church and State, but I think they're out to lunch on this one. They're saying that since Mr. Flagrante has left the church, "the church's interest is over." Sure, it's none of the church's fucking business, but it's not illegal to be a gossippy busybody.
My verdict: Spankings for everyone! And no dessert, either.

Gummi Bears have put their little fructose-filled heads together to foil fingerprint security systems. Due to their known terrorist sympathies, Gummi bears (particularly foreign-born ones) will be rounded up and sent to Gitmo, where their bodies will be stretched and their extremities will be cruelly nibbled off unless they tell the interrogators what they want to hear.

Sophomoric prank elevated to awesomeness by Gladys Knight, a Hispanic midget, and a silver bowl of gourmet nuts:

There was no way we were going to pull this off.

"All right, everyone," I said, "I have absolute confidence we will pull this off."